(AFP, WENN.COM) Images: Mismatched celeb couples

What the hell, Jason Sudeikis.

Seriously, does this guy have some kind of career-destroying blackmail dirt on Hollywood’s hottest starlets? Is he a vampire with the ability to glamour victims at will? Or is he just – ick – monstrously endowed and a virtuoso in the sack?

It’s not that the 37-year-old Saturday Night Live castmember and star of such cinematic gems as Horrible Bosses and Hall Pass is unattractive, per se. But he consistently punches above his weight class, dating January Jones, making out with Eva Mendes and now shacked up with the amazing Olivia Wilde, best known for TV’s House, Tron: Legacy and having the most heart-stopping eyes on earth.

Knowing that the two lovebirds are now living together was bad enough, but during a women’s monologue series in New York City earlier this week, the 28-year-old Wilde said that she and Sudeikis “have sex like Kenyan marathon runners” and that she’s so into him, “I could find David Beckham naked in a cardboard box on my doorstep and I would drop him off at the pound.” Argh. Torture.

We’re jealous, but not bitter. These kinds of mismatched celebrity hookups give us normal schlubs hope that some day we might find a smart, funny, drop-dead gorgeous woman who will see our inner selves. Assuming we become really rich and famous actors, musicians or producers first.

There have been dozens of bizarre celebrity couples over the years – Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton? Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett? Brigitte Nielsen and Flavor Flav? – but on the heels of Wilde and Sudeikis, here are the ones that currently have us scratching our heads.

(View gallery above for Steve Tilley’s most mismatched couples)