 |
In what is supposed to be a family comedy, David Spade plays a bitter and angry former TV star who is now being spurned by Hollywood and is desperate to revive his career.
Through one of those monumentally unlikely plot twists that only a Hollywood movie can turn on, Spade is obliged to find a "normal" family which will let him move in to learn what he missed as a child. This apparently will allow him to earn a key adult role in a new Rob Reiner movie (and Reiner actually shows up in a major support role as himself).
It turns out that the family actually has something to teach Spade's sorry character. And he has something to offer them, especially sexy mom (feisty Mary McCormack in a thankless role) and the two kids (Scott Terra and the darling Jenna Boyd, who could become a real child star -- but only in something else).
There are a couple of genuinely funny moments in Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star. They are the kind of skit jokes, such as the delicious repeated routine with the champagne cork, that belong in a Saturday Night Live show, the place where Spade became a star.
But the story in the movie is too stupid to sustain the laughter. Spade's movie career has been awful, for the most part, and movies like this will drive another nail in the coffin. It is not that he lacks talent -- we saw him excel at times on SNL -- but he has not shown the ability or the iron will to use his talent in the service of a strong movie idea.
In this case, the idea belongs to Spade himself, developed in concert with his business partner Fred Wolf. So blame the hapless Spade. Adam Sandler is co-producer, another indicator of the low-brow level that Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star maintains throughout its 98 minutes.
Ultimately, the only real treat is a profane We Are The World satire-cum-rant by real former child stars making cameo appearances at the end of the movie. Some of them also appear in earlier scenes, as Spade's poker buddies. If you know who Danny Bonaduce, Leif Garret and Corey Feldman are, you will get a kick out of their antics in the movie. It is just too bad you have to watch a lousy movie to get to see them at the end.
The We Are The World routine comes in the final credits so don't leave, unless, of course, you have already bailed out early and escaped this disaster.
A CORNUCOPIA OF CHILD STARS
The title character in Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star is fictional, and a phony, but the movie is bursting with cameo appearances by real former child or TV stars. Here's a list, in alphabetical order so that egos are left intact, with one of their claims to fame as a reference:
Willie Aames: Swiss Family Robinson
Fred Berry: What's Happening!!
Danny Bonaduce: The Partridge Family
Todd Bridges: Diff'rent Strokes
Gary Coleman: Diff'rent Strokes
Jeff Conaway: Taxi
Dustin Diamond: Saved By The Bell
Tony Dow: Leave It To Beaver
Corey Feldman: Stand By Me
Leif Garrett: teen pop music idol
Corey Haim: The Edison Twins
Emmanuel Lewis: Webster
Barry Livingston: My Three Sons
Mike Lookinland: The Brady Bunch
Maureen McCormick: The Brady Bunch
Eddie Mekka: Laverne & Shirley
Jeremy Miller: Growing Pains
Haywood Nelson: As The World Turns
Jay North: Dennis The Menace
Butch Patrick-Lilly: The Munsters
Paul Petersen: The Mickey Mouse Club (1955)
Adam Rich: Eight Is Enough
Rodney Allen Rippy: Jack In The Box ads, 1970s
Charleen Tilton: Dallas
Barry Williams: The Brady Bunch
Also seen in the flick as themselves:
Tom Arnold: True Lies; Jann Carl: Entertainment Tonight; Peter Dante: The Wedding Singer; Florence Henderson: The Brady Bunch; Jonathan Loughran: Anger Management; Eddie Moran: One Life To Live; Ron Palillo: Welcome Back, Kotter; Rob Reiner: The Princess Bride; Marion Ross: Life With Father; Ernest Thomas: What's Happening!!
(This film is rated PG)