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Elektra is one of those rare sequels (or in this case, even rarer spinoffs) that are actually better than the movie that spawned them. But since that movie was 2003's gawdawful superhero flick, Daredevil, it ain't sayin' much.
And most of this by-the-numbers actioner's not-total-suckitude is owed to the delicious and nutritious Jennifer Garner, and how hot she looks in the titular character's skintight ninja outfits, skintight sweaters and jeans, skintight bathing suits and that sullen, sultry pout that she wears 24/7. Elektra smiles less often than Dirty Harry with shingles.
Though she was killed by bad guy Bullseye in the Ben Affleck-driven Daredevil (Colin Farrell's nutbar assassin is the one who really deserved a spin-off from that flick), Elektra is back in business, thanks to the healing - nay, resurrecting - hands of her blind kung-fu mentor, Stick (Terence Stamp, who had his shining superhero movie moment as the power-hungry General Zod in Superman II. Kneel before him!).
Back working her day job as a cold-hearted and obsessive-compulsive assassin, Elektra is dispatched to kill a hunky single dad (ER's Goran Visnjic) and his bratty, but good-hearted, teenage daughter, Abby (Kristen Prout), but has the all-too expected change of heart and decides to spare them.
This sits none too well with the Hand, a group of shady businessmen and their shadier underlings who look like cast-offs from The Crow. Before long, the Hand is looking to beat down Abby (who is a legendary martial arts prodigy, but don't tell anyone) and her pops, and Elektra is the only thing standing between them. Cue the predictable march to the expected but surprisingly uninvolving showdown.
Sans Garner, Elektra might have been the next Catwoman. (Then again, Catwoman stunk like month-old kitty litter even with Oscar winner Halle Berry in the title role, so maybe its awfulness is completely unmatchable.)
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Garner brings the same kind of plausible humanity to this implausible role that she does to mistress of disguise Sidney Bristow on Alias.
Except Alias has the benefit of strong supporting characters, interesting backstories and well-written scripts, things Elektra can't fall back on.
The stunts and fight scenes are mostly decent, more so because Elektra doesn't have any true super-powers, other than a second sight that tells her when a bad ninja is about to come bursting through the door. You almost - almost - believe a well-trained warrior woman could pull off some of the things she does.
In fact, the first two-thirds of the film are surprisingly and welcomely grounded in reality, for a comic book flick. It's only when the Hand's magic ninjas come after Elektra and her charges that things start to get really silly.
Among the bad guys are Stone, who can't be harmed by bullets, but squashes nicely under falling redwoods; Tattoo, whose animal inkwork comes to life at his bidding; and the goth-hottie Typhoid (Maxim model Natassia Malthe), who literally gives her foes the kiss of death. (Would it be tawdry to suggest one of the film's highlights was the long, luscious liplock that she and Garner share? Nah.)
Given its direct inspiration (the Daredevil movie), Elektra is better than you might expect. But given the ultimate source material (Frank Miller's moody and moving Daredevil comics from the mid-'80s), it's a squandering of character and story that would make Comic Book Guy weep.
As a saving grace for your movie, you could do a lot worse than Jennifer Garner. But girlfriend, you've paid your dues - go find a film role with some meat, and let Marvel continue to pimp out their heroes to anyone who flashes the cash.
We've got $20 that says Fantastic Four will suck even worse.