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As with Sinatra's old Rat Pack movies (and this is the only time you'll see me compare Adam Sandler to Sinatra), there's a lot better time being had onscreen in Grown Ups than in the theatre.
The conceit is the same. Take a bunch of real-life comedic friends, under the aegis of an alpha male who pays the bills and whose friends depend on him for work. Put them in a "fun" place (for the Rat Pack, it was Vegas, for the Sand Pack it's a New England lake resort). Add a yes-man director. Let them riff and hilarity will ensue.
The reality is a lot more moribund. Even Sandler has said, re: the inevitable DVD extras, "if there was anything funny there, it'd be in the movie." Inadvertently, he nailed it. Awash in "in" jokes, Grown Ups is remarkably barren of funny, a movie whose idea of hilarious is Rob Schneider constantly French-kissing his 75-year-old girlfriend (Joyce Van Patten). Half-funny jokes are repeated to the point of assault.
It's hard to figure out who this movie is for. The prevalence of sophomoric fart and pee jokes suggests Sandler is still reaching out for his longtime key demographic. On the other hand, the premise suggests a maturing Sandman, one mindful of the passage of time and aiming for a richer comic vein (or at least at fortysomething parents).
The nostalgic template is put in place with home-movie-type scenes of a '70s church league basketball team winning a championship (on boy-Sandler's winning basket, natch). Flash ahead 30 years, and the coach of that team has died, prompting the long-estranged friends to drag their wives and kids to their cottage country hometown for a getting-to-know-you-again weekend.
The big dog in the group is Lenny Feder (Sandler), a bigtime Hollywood agent who spends considerably less time on his cellphone than Entourage's Ari Gold. With him are his fashion designer wife (Salma Hayek) and snotty video-game addict sons, who text their demands for high-end bottled water from their nanny.
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Rounding out the group is blustery salesman Eric (Kevin James), whose wife (Maria Bello) still breastfeeds their four-year-old son; new-age bore Rob (Schneider), with the aforementioned fixation on "older women"; househusband Kurt (Chris Rock), who's constantly belittled by his exec wife (Maya Rudolph) and farting mother-in-law (Ebony Jo-Ann); and overripe ladies' man Marcus (David Spade).
In a Rat Pack movie, at least there's a heist to hold your attention. In Grown Ups, there's a lot of drinking beer and talking about good old days and crappy new days. The kids discover the joys of "lame" outdoor entertainment like water parks. Life lessons are learned.
Oh, and there's a Round 2 basketball game, in which our middle-aged heroes are challenged by members of the team they beat back in the day (captained by Colin Quinn). The approach they take will be symbolic of all the epiphanies they have experienced on their life-and-friendship affirming weekend.
Somehow, where I was sitting, these epiphanies went unexperienced.
(This film is rated PG)
jim.slotek@sunmedia.ca