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September 22, 2007
'Resident Evil' sequel DOA
By LIZ BRAUN - Sun Media
Resident Evil: Extinction -- no such luck. The title promise of some sort of finish to this nonsense is a big fat lie, and Part 3 of the Resident Bloody Frickin' Evil franchise winds up with the door wide open for further sequels. As for this one, Extinction, we can tell you that the gooshy sound of bullets blowing through the heads of zombies for 95 minutes does not a movie make. Milla Jovovich returns as Alice, she upon whom the future depends. Zombies rule the world, falling upon the few remaining humans and feasting on their flesh. The end of the world has come, but scientists living underground continue to hope that through Alice's mutated blood they will find an antidote to the zombification. Or whatever. Alice rides her motorcycle through the desert, trying to find and help any survivors. She has to stop to fight and kill zombie attack dogs. You know how it goes. Next we meet a convoy of zombie dodgers, humans who stay on the road and on the move to survive. Their leader is played by Ali Larter. This group, which includes Ashanti and Oded Fehr, gets attacked by zombies a lot. Then they have to kill the zombies. Then more zombies attack them, so they kill those zombies too. They drive around and kill more zombies (frankly, when you've seen one zombie, you've seen them all -- the flayed and gnarly flesh, the growling, the British teeth. It's pretty boring.) Later, this lot get attacked by masses of crows that have been eating zombies, so they're like zombie crows, which is about the same only with feathers. The nomads and Alice meet up, kill zombies together in Vegas (all the crappy tourist crap has sand on it, because it's the end of the world and all) and eventually Larter and her band of survivors head north hoping to find lands unspoiled by the zombie virus. You so won't care. Alice goes back to the science lab for reasons we didn't really understand. There, she encounters a super-duper zombie with whom she must do battle. You might imagine that Resident Evil: Extinction might be really scary or gross but it's just dull. There's no story, the dialogue will make you laugh out loud, the special effects are often cheesy, the acting is terrible and any scary bits are announced in advance through ham-handed movie making. Otherwise, it's great. |
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