February 12, 2013
Hey, Beyonce! Go away!
By Liz Braun, QMI Agency

Beyonce performs during the Super Bowl XLVII halftime show at the Mercedes-Benz Superdome in New Orleans, La., Feb. 3, 2013. (JEFF HAYNES/Reuters)

This Saturday, Oprah Winfrey interviews Beyonce!

They will talk about the documentary Beyonce: Life is but a Dream!!!

They will probably talk about other things, like lip-synching and motherhood and whether two women with such a similarly overdeveloped Messianic complex can be in the same room at the same time without a spontaneous meltdown of the earth's core!!!

Wait -- there's more. According to Gwyneth Paltrow, her buddy Beyonce is the best performer on the planet. Paltrow has told Vogue magazine, "When she is working onstage, she has more power than any woman I've ever seen. She would never say it and has never said it, but I feel she knows with every fibre of her being that she is the best in the world at her job."

Hmnnn - debatable. Among other things, this suggests that Paltrow has never seen Tina Turner or Michael Jackson in concert, but maybe she meant best-right-now. And that's still debatable. Never mind.