ONE HEART

DARRYL STERDAN

, Last Updated: 2:06 PM ET


ONE HEART
CELINE DION
(Columbia/Sony)

After last year's stomach-turning shlockfest A New Day Has Come -- an insipid, CD-length love letter to her little bundle of frozen-embryo joy Rene-Charles -- we presumed Celine Dion couldn't sink any lower. Which raises the question: What were we thinking?

This is, after all, the publicity-addicted überdiva who went on a year-long campaign to trumpet her own "retirement" and who panders shamelessly to U.S. fans by belting out patriotic songs like a windup doll. Hell, crass commercialism and raging egomania are her stocks in trade. Put 'em together again and you have One Heart, her most superficial and soulless album yet -- and that's saying something.

It's bad enough the 14-song CD is full of unoriginal, instantly forgettable fluff -- leftover Britney bubble-pop from Max Martin, cliche chest-pounding power ballads, a title cut that's a blatant Shania soundalike and a Cher-style Eurodisco revamp of the Roy Orbison hit I Drove All Night, which she's already turned into a Chrysler jingle.

What's even more deplorable is that Celine and her senior-citizen Svengali Rene Angelil obviously put far more effort into marketing than music. The disc comes with a scent sample for her new perfume; an ad for her latest corporate sugar-daddy Chrysler; and not one but two pitches for her Vegas show (which debuted the day the CD came out).

For cryin' out loud, what's next? Autographed packets of her kid's diaper droppings? Then again, why not? They couldn't stink any worse than this. (More on Celine Dion)

Track Listing
1. I Drove All Night
2. Love Is All We Need
3. Faith
4. In His Touch
5. One Heart
6. Stand By Your Side
7. Naked
8. Sorry For Love
9. Have You Ever Been In Love
10. Reveal
11. Coulda Woulda Shoulda I
12. Je T'aime (Encore)
 


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