Oh. My. Gawd!

Like, the thought of the hot, rich, and famous cast of The Hills not coming into our livingrooms every Monday so we can live vicariously through them is totally unbearable.

But chill, OK? There's one episode left. And you can bet your pet Pekingese there's going to be drama.

Will Heidi and Spencer call it quits? Will Brody profess his undying love for Lauren? Is obsessing over other peoples' TV lives as unhealthy as it seems?

All of those questions and more will be answered -- or not -- when the ridiculously hyped, overly anticipated Season 3 finale of The Hills hits MTV tonight.

And believe it or not -- there's even more! The MTV Canada-produced The Hills After Show is packing up its cheeky hosts Jessi Cruickshank and Dan Levy -- along with 40 contest-winning Canucks -- and heading down to Hollywood to broadcast live following tonight's finale.

Cast members from The Hills will answer audience questions and make an "exciting announcement." (A fourth season, perhaps?) Lauren and the gals will also walk a red carpet preceding tonight's episode. Check out thehills.mtv.com.

A quick primer on the cheating, back-stabbing and manipulating to date:

Lauren Conrad (aka L.C.)

Age: 21

Occupation: Intern at Teen Vogue. (But rumour has it it's all for show.)

Scoop: Last we saw Hills queen L.C., she was perusing her off-and-on crush Brody's electronic chicktionary. She found 25 names under "A" and "B" alone -- including the especially naughty "Britney Canada Whore." Naturally, this means she wants him more than ever. Good luck, Lauren!

Audrina Patridge

Age: 22

Occupation: Flirting with cute musicians at Epic Records.

Scoop: While tossing out bad biker boy Justin Bobby, it appears Audrina also got rid of her bad judgment. Her rebound date -- Aussie Corey -- is so sweet and clean-cut, even Lauren approves. It's too good to be true. And given her luck, it probably is.

Heidi Montag

Age: 21

Occupation: Events coordinator at nightclub company Bolthouse.

Scoop: A promotion, an engagement, a boob job, a nasty fallout with former bff Lauren -- it has been an eventful year for young Heidi. Too bad she had to spend it with a controlling @#$%!bag.BTW, we've, like, totally bought into the Internet rumours that the feuding fiances are going to fake a split tonight.

Whitney Port

Age: 22

Occupation: Fashion contributor and intern supervisor at Teen Vogue.

Scoop: While she did have a onscreen fling with her trainer a few episodes back, intelligent Whitney and her ueber-skinny legs are obvs. too good for this show. Her boss is shipping her off to Paris on tonight's finale -- but not without a jealous rant from underling Lauren, who once turned down a Paris opportunity for druggie bf Jason (but that's a whole 'nother story).

Brody Jenner

Age: 24

Occupation: Sometime model; full-time womanizer.

Scoop: Even after Lauren invaded his handheld, there's no way God's Gift to Women is going to commit. Not with all the beautiful ladies Los Angeles (and apparently Canada) has to offer. Brody -- the wealthy son of Olympic decathlon champ Bruce Jenner who allegedly once convinced Nicole Richie to eat -- will kiss the ground his ex-bff Spencer walks on before tying himself down. Got it, L.C.?

Frankie Delgado

Age: Twenty-something

Occupation: Brody's manager? Nightclub bigwig? Who knows?

Scoop: Frankie may have been the Batman to Brody's Robin, but he's a hanger-on at heart. We're not even sure what he's doing on this list.

Spencer Pratt

Age: 24

Occupation: Showing up at his fiancee Heidi's office.

Scoop: Words cannot express how we feel about Pratty boy -- or at least not words we can print. But chances are Heidi won't be able to hold herself back tonight, after good ol' Spence walked out on her -- for the second time -- last week. Ready, set, fight!

Justin "Bobby" Brescia

Age: 25

Occupation: Hair stylist and former model.

Scoop: He's so sleazy we can smell him through the TV. And yet, Audrina's ex Justin -- or Bobby, or whatever -- and his uncontrollable locks are oddly intriguing. Unfortunately, he finds kissing other girls in front of his girlfriend funny -- which is almost as uncool as stealing Johnny Depp's image. If all goes well, he'll be MIA tonight.

Stephanie Pratt (aka She-Pratt)

Age: 21

Occupation: Former shoplifter.

Scoop: It only took two episodes for Spencer's sister to establish herself as a puppetmaster. After drunkenly wailing out Lauren at a bar and telling her bro Heidi's feet are getting cold, she's now the subject of message board hatred everywhere. With a fugly mugshot now in the mix, we surely haven't seen the last of She-Pratt!