Golden Globes a circus, but don't take them seriously

Seth MacFarlane may be the only celebrity to get the Golden Globes absolutely in perspective ... in...

Seth MacFarlane may be the only celebrity to get the Golden Globes absolutely in perspective ... in public ... with plenty of venom in his fangs for the Hollywood Foreign Press Association. (WENN)

Bruce Kirkland, QMI Agency

, Last Updated: 1:38 PM ET

Seth MacFarlane may be the only celebrity to get the Golden Globes absolutely in perspective ... in public ... with plenty of venom in his fangs for the Hollywood Foreign Press Association.

The acerbic actor, animator, producer and filmmaker has openly ridiculed the Globes as phoney awards that can be bought for the price of a luncheon. He most famously did it through Family Guy, his satirical TV cartoon series. Employing one of his alter egos, MacFarlane let potty-mouthed infant Stewie Griffin loose on the Globes in a profanity-spiked, conversational rant with Consuela, the maid. The episode, And Then There Were Fewer, first aired Sept. 26, 2010.

Consuela says of winning a Golden Globe: “Is very important award.”

Stewie answers sarcastically, first to Consuela and then directly to the camera and the audience: “No, no, a-a-actually, if I can clarify this, it’s not a very important award. Okay? Here’s how the Golden Globes work. You want a Golden Globe? All you gotta do is take a member of the Foreign Press out to lunch and they’ll vote for you. Hmm? That’s all you gotta do.

“A-a-and there’s only like 30 guys in the Foreign Press, so it-it-it’s relatively easy to buy to buy one of those things, okay? You with me, America? You with me? So let’s ... so let’s just shut the f--- up about the prestige of these damn things, because, you know, it’s just ... It’s a sale, you know? I mean, y-you might as well walk into a Zales and say: ‘Hey, file me up one of these and I’ll pay you the price of a bacon burger.’ Okay? W-w-we all clear on what the Golden Globes are? Alright? Now, that said, if anyone from the Paris Observer would like to have lunch, it’s on me. Ha, ha.”

After that tirade, it comes as no surprise to note that neither MacFarlane nor Family Guy has ever been nominated for a Golden Globe. However, in advance of hosting the Oscars a year ago, MacFarlane did show up as a guest at the 70th Golden Globes ceremony in Los Angeles. He spent his time at the event live Tweeting and tweaking. But most of his targets were other celebrities, not the awards themselves.

“Tommy Lee Jones laughing uproariously at Wiig and Ferrell. I'm told this is also his sex face,” read one of his tweets.

Then he bombed at the Oscars because he was too tame.

Oh well, he did get the Golden Globes right. Except for one thing. There are more members of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association than Stewie let on. He said 30. The membership hovers around 90. With deaths matching new members, the list rarely gets over 100. Some members are not full-time professional film critics or journalists. Some (and I could name names) are complete idiots. Some are actually qualified to vote on awards, as this organization of mostly Los Angeles-based foreign journalists has been doing since 1943.

But the key factor in dismissing the Golden Globes as “important” is that no small group of people — especially this motley bunch — should hold sway over something as high-profile as these awards have become. And the only reason they are high-profile is because Hollywood studios shamelessly use the Golden Globes as a marketing tool, a hype machine for last-minute Oscar votes.

Celebrities seem to enjoy the event, however. It is a dress rehearsal for the Academy Awards. Plus they get to drink themselves stupid (in some cases) in a more casual setting than stuffy Oscar allows. But listen to Stewie: Do not take the Golden Globes seriously. This is just another Hollywood circus.

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