  Simon Cowell. (Handout) |
Forget finding the next American Idol. Reality TV’s biggest quest right now is for Simon Cowell’s replacement. And let the outspoken judge tell you himself, it’s no simple task.
“You’re never going to pick anyone as good as you, are you?” Cowell said, laughing, during a conference call on Thursday.
Not when you’re Simon Cowell — the British music and TV exec who has told it like it is (and, consequently, crushed the superstar dreams of thousands of tone-deaf Americans) since taking a seat on the judging panel of Fox’s sing-off mega-hit American Idol in 2002.
Cowell announced last month that the show’s ninth and current season — which airs its first live Top 24 episode on Tuesday — will be his last, before he starts working on a U.S. version of similar talent show The X Factor, set to launch on Fox in fall 2011.
Speculations about who will take Cowell’s seat as the new Idol judge next season have been swirling out of control ever since. Radio jock Howard Stern, blogger Perez Hilton, record producer Steve Lillywhite and even Madonna have been rumoured possibilities — but not all of them are qualified, Cowell says.
“Steve Lillywhite? The record producer? Is he handsome?” Cowell asked. “You’ve gotta be good looking.”
As for Madonna?
“It will never happen, because you’ve got to give a massive, massive time commitment.”
While he thinks Hilton would be “funny” and “could work,” Cowell said he feels that Stern — who has been telling his listeners he’s in the running for Cowell’s spot, and “there’s not a better job on the planet than judging that f---ing karaoke contest” — might not have what it takes.
“I know Howard’s name has been in there for a while, but I’m fairly certain that there hasn’t been an approach in there at any time for Howard to do the show,” Cowell said, stressing the importance that whoever replaces him has to have industry experience.
“It’s like, if you judge the ice skating at the Olympics. If you’re going to give a score, you genuinely need to know what you’re talking about. And I think over the years, (reality TV) judges have been replaced by personalities. That in the long run will create problems, because you’ve got to be able to spot a star. So whoever replaces me, my advice has always been, find somebody who knows what they’re talking about and who has actually experienced success in the music business.
“(Howard) doesn’t seem to fit any of this criteria. He’s played records — maybe that’s a good qualification, that he’s a DJ. But if he wants the job, good luck to him.”
That’s not to discredit new judge Ellen DeGeneres — who has been criticized by Idol fans for not having enough music experience to fill Paula Abdul’s seat this season.
“She actually is very responsible for people she has performing on her talk show,” he said. “I know that for a fact, because I’ve dealt with her as a record label. And she loves music, and she’s been an artist — so it wasn’t meant to dis’ her credentials. It was specifically talking about my replacement because my role on the show was as someone who has run a successful record label.”
Cowell also wants to clear the air of rumours about he and DeGeneres are not getting along during the shooting of the Hollywood Round. He says a story claiming he showed up an hour late when she wanted to film is totally faux (he was really only 20 minutes late), and that he “wouldn’t say we didn’t get on well.”
Besides, he still has more than half of the season to get through alongside DeGeneres and other panelists Kara DioGuardi and Randy Jackson. And it’s a season he plans to make the most of.
His hopes? To have Lady Gaga as a guest mentor (“because she is the most relevant pop artist at the moment”), to see a female take the crown (“I’d love to find a Taylor Swift”), and to continue dishing out constructive criticism in the blunt manner that Idol viewers have come to expect and respect.
“I want to go out on a high. This is my last season, I want it to be successful — and I’ll do everything I can to make it happen.”
lindsey.ward@sunmedia.ca
