August 22, 2007
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TV Show: Anchorwoman

WWE bombshell anchors the news
By BILL HARRIS -- Sun Media


Former Price is Right model and WWE diva Lauren Jones stars in Anchorwoman, a new reality series from Fox.

The premise of Anchorwoman can be summed up in three quotes.

#1: "You know, I could do this if I were doing it in a bikini," says blond bombshell and would-be TV news-reader Lauren Jones during the pilot episode of Anchorwoman, the reality-comedy-combo series which debuts tonight on Fox.

In fact, had Jones taken the bikini route, it would have added some much-needed excitement to this familiar fish-out-of-water story.

#2: "It's not like I'm a bimbo," Jones says.

Of course, as a former Miss New York, former model on The Price is Right and former WWE diva, Jones has perfected the concept of acting like a bimbo, her actual bimbo status notwithstanding. And as Jones joins the staff of KYTX, a viewership-challenged television station in Tyler, Tex., it's her bimbo-esque qualities that provide the foundation for whatever humour can be found.

#3: "I don't have 14 years of journalism experience, but ... I've always wanted to do it!" Jones reasons with bimbo-style, unbridled enthusiasm.

So, if you just want to do something really, really badly, how does that translate in the credentials department?

Of course, when watching Anchorwoman, it's hard to tell who is more unintentionally funny: Jones and her innocently chosen skank attire, or the other too-earnest-to-be-true staffers at KYTX.

Seriously, if all TV employees working on small-town newscasts were as dedicated to journalistic integrity as these folks claim to be, then local TV news wouldn't be dying just about everywhere.

In particular, KYTX anchor Annalisa Petralia acts as if no one in the history of television ever has been hired on the basis of their looks before. Didn't these people ever see the 1987 movie Broadcast News with the hunky William Hurt, the sweaty Albert Brooks and the plucky Holly Hunter?

And for heaven's sake, KYTX has an on-air segment with a small pooch known as Stormy The Weather Dog, so everyone should quit acting as if they're direct blood descendants of Walter Cronkite.

At least the general manager and president of KYTX, Phil Hurley, is honest about why he hired Jones and commissioned cameras to follow her around.

"We're the new guy here and we're looking for as many eyeballs as we can get in a short period of time," Hurley says. "The ideal outcome for Lauren being here would be our ratings and our newscast begin to move upward and our station becomes more successful."

Then again, KYTX is a CBS affiliate, so maybe Hurley is trying to sabotage Fox with a crappy reality show.

Anyway, at its best, Anchorwoman is mildly amusing. And to give credit where credit is due, the creators do a good job of building up the moment-by-moment tension as Jones' first live broadcast approaches.

But at its worst, Anchorwoman is kind of dull. And with all these celebrity-reality hybrids, you certainly get the impression that a lot of this stuff is semi-scripted, and everyone is aware that the cameras are on them at all times.

"I'm just going to go down there and, like, do the news," Jones vows. "And I'm so opinionated, this is such a good opportunity for me to voice my opinions about, like, I don't know, terrorism."

Well, maybe that would work. If she's wearing a bikini. And the sound is turned down.


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