There's an old Ukrainian proverb: when life gives you sardines, make sardine perogies. Chances are no one will eat them, but that's not your problem.

Kim Choma, the curvaceous 25-year-old swimsuit model, who was one of two Edmonton women starring on the romance-reality series The Bachelor, was handed the cruel sardine perogy of fate last night and sent home without the rose that would have placed her in the show's final three.

While she was clearly dumbstruck by the turn of events - nobody wielded cleavage better than our Kimmy, and wield it she most certainly did - Choma left with her head held high and her smile frozen in place, while bachelor Charlie O'Connell blubbered his apologies. Attagirl, Kim! Always leave 'em weeping, if not of a broken heart, then at least of a kick to the groin or nasty rash or a faked pregnancy. Whatever works.

Last night's episode of the show, seen locally on A-Channel and ABC, had O'Connell visiting the hometowns of the four remaining girls in order to whittle them down to a trio of finalists. While I'm only contractually obligated to talk about the Edmonton part of the show, I have to say that I'm still pulling for Sarah B. to go all the way.

She's cute, well-spoken, has a good job, owns her own home in Texas and a sister who is WAY HOT. If Charlie is half the dog he appears to be, you can bet he had the sisters scenario running through his head. I know I did.

Next up was Chuckles's visit to Edmonton, where Kim descended from on high via that totally lame balloon ferris wheel in Galaxyland that nobody has ever been on, ever. (They probably took the engine out years ago and had to put it back in just for this show.)

After fun and games at West Edmonton Mall, the couple went to Kim's family's restaurant, the Pyrogy House. There, Kim's sweetheart of a mom listed off the 11 varieties of perogies they sell (including sardine, which she admitted are vile) and taught Charlie how to make them, which involves quickly whipping the little dough circles from one table to another, for reasons I didn't quite twig to.

"Ukrainians are always fast!" exclaimed mom. See, Kim's just living up to her cultural heritage! (Just kidding, my fun-loving-although-somewhat-easily-riled Ukrainian brothers and sisters.)

Later, the two adjourned to the hip and happenin' Sapphire on Whyte Avenue for some drinks and alone time. But look! Who's this? Why, it's previously spurned Edmontonian bachelorette Jenny Adams and Kim's ex-boyfriend, Jason, who just happened to be hanging out together despite barely knowing one another, and just happened to stop in at the otherwise closed-to-the-public Sapphire that evening! Man, reality TV is just full of interesting coincidences!

Jason wanted to be alone to talk to Kim, while Jenny wanted some one-on-one face time with Charlie. Or to hear Charlie explain it: "Jason was, like, 'Can I talk to you?' And Kimberley was, like, 'No.' I was, like, 'Go talk to him.' And then she was, like, 'No.' And then Jenn was, like, 'Yes.' And I was, like, 'Yes.' And she was, like, 'No.' And then we were, like, 'Go ahead,' And then she was like, 'OK.' " Charlie, you've been, like, spending way too time with, like, Kim.

Anyway, Jenny sat at the bar with Chucko and quizzed him on what it was he was looking for. "I told her I don't know what I'm looking for," Charlie said later. "(But) I'm not looking for Jenn in Edmonton."

Ouch! Was that a Jenny burn or an Edmonton burn? Or a double-barrelled napalm-fuelled burning burnination of both? Either way, you'd better never show your goofy mug in this town again, foo', or we'll break your kneecaps with goalie sticks. Although Jenny didn't embarrass herself too badly, it was all cringes, all the time, with Jason. Granted, you know the producers edited their talk for maximum entertainment value, and it was awesome seeing Kim squirm when Jason asked if Charlie could handle "Kim Wild" - no relation, we assume, to Kids In America singer Kim Wilde.

But when Jason asked Kim if she and Charlie had "the meatball connection," I think I winced so hard I actually sprained my brow. "I'm never calling anyone else my meatball," said Jason. Owww! My brow!

"You'll always be my meatball." No! Stop it!

"We're each other's meatballs." That does it! I'm sending you my physiotherapy bill!

The date ended with Kim and Charlie playing a little tonsil shinny in the middle of the sidewalk on Whyte Avenue before Charlie moved on to Sarah W. and Krisily's hometowns, where Sarah W. acted like a twitchy loon and Krisily acted like an insecure 10th-grader, though her straight-talking, Edith Bunker-voiced grandma was a sheer delight.

When it came time for the rose ceremony back in New York, Charlie was all choked up with guilt and indecision. He finally gave the three roses to Sarah B., Krisily and Sarah W., leaving Kim nothing short of stunned.

"It feels like you got hit by a train," Kim said afterwards, adding that she believes she'll see Charlie again some day.

Sure, invite him back to Edmonton. We'll be waiting at the city limits with goalie sticks. And a plate of sardine perogies.