April 15, 2005
Donuts not dollars for Coby
By -- JAM! Showbiz

Coby Archa got the boot for his bold plotting and fiesty nature. (Photo courtesy of CBS)

Based on current market prices, one million dollars could buy you approximately 100,000 medium-sized pizzas, 200,000 bags of chocolate chip cookies and 2,400,000 donuts. Taking this into account and based on their actions on last night's episode, the 'Survivor Palau' players evidently have no common sense whatsoever. That is, everyone except for Tom Westman, the 41-year-old New York firefighter. Tom was the only Koror Tribe member who did not throw the first 'Palau' Individual Immunity Challenge - a stand-on-a-platform-for-as-long-as-you-can endurance test - for some tasty treats offered by host Jeff Probst. One has to wonder whether the other competitors are truly that serious about playing the game or are they just that arrogant?

For his part in the brainless Koror forfeit, Coby Archa, the 32-year-old hairstylist from Texas, traded in his chance at the million dollar prize for two...count them...T-W-O...donuts. Koror, including new member - Ulong's 'Sole Survivor' Stephenie LaGrossa - gave Coby a one-way ticket to the first seat on the 'Palau' jury.

Stephenie was "absorbed" by the dominant Koror Tribe after living for about a day or so by herself at the Ulong camp. As a reward for utterly destroying the competition, Koror kept their campsite and their name. No new tribe was formed since there was no official merger. It was another first for the 'Survivor' series.

The Survivors at the start of the broadcast were:


Ulong Tribe

1. Stephenie.

Koror Tribe

1. Ian.
2. Katie.
3. Tom.
4. Janu.
5. Gregg.
6. Jennifer.
7. Coby.
8. Caryn.

Ulong Tribal Happenings (Night 21)

Looking like a little girl lost, Stephenie paddles back to camp alone. She is excited at being the last Ulong member left standing but is scared to death at the prospect of surviving all on her own. Stephenie: It is just me now.

To make matters worse, the fire she left burning is almost out. After stumbling around in the dark, Stephenie gets it to burn brightly again. Stephenie admits that Bobby Jon taught her everything she knows about building and maintaining a fire. Stephenie: He taught me well, maybe a little too well. I beat him at the challenge. As she lies by the fire, Stephenie isn't sure she will go to sleep tonight for fear the fire will go out. Stephenie: It is scary as hell. I will never give up though. I am not a quitter.

Ulong Tribal Happenings (Day 22)

Stephenie carves a notch in the tree calendar. Steph: 22 down. Only 17 days to go. It is a huge shock. Everything is on my shoulders now. Stephenie sits by herself and eats a coconut. Stephenie: I have to do everything on my own. She wonders if she might starve to death.

Koror Tribal Happenings (Day 22)

Ian realizes it is Day 22. They are reaching the final phase of the game. They are all physically feeling it. They are getting thinner, that is for sure. Ian says that some of the other tribe members are dragging the others down. Coby is just an annoying pain in the ass and Janu just lies around all the time like a weird aunt kept locked in the attic.

It is time for Coby to rant. He sounds off as Caryn listens. Coby is sick of Koror. He is very cranky but is trying to maintain his composure. He thinks he will stay away from the "boys" (Ian, Gregg and Tom) today just to be safe. He mocks them for sitting around and talking about fishing when they should just off their butts and do it.

Ulong Tribal Happenings (Day 23)

Stephenie grabs the canoe and starts fishing. There is not many fish or clams to be had. At least she has coconuts, right? Well, maybe. Stephenie uses a huge bamboo pole to try and knock some of them down. No luck there. She almost injures herself in the process. The pole is just too heavy and awkward. Finally, she climbs the tree and manages to knock a coconut down to the ground. Stephenie: At least it is a big one. At the campfire, Stephenie claims she almost dislocated her shoulder in her coconut hunt. As she sobs, Stephenie says that if she wins, all of what she is going through would have been worth it.

Courtesy of the 'Senior Poet' on the production staff, a special note is waiting for Stephenie at the tree mail location. It reads:

"Dirty, hungry and all alone. This is no way to be. Pack your canoe with all you want and paddle out to sea. The lone Ulong Survivor, you're the only to endure. The next phase of your adventure, starts with a trip to Koror."

There is also a package she must deliver to the Koror Tribe.

Stephenie is thrilled. Stephenie: That is awesome! I will have friends and food! I gotta get the hell out of here.

Packing up some belongings, Stephenie hopes she doesn't cry when she arrives at Koror. Putting the Ulong's flag in the canoe as well, Stephenie shouts: See you later, Ulong!, as she starts paddling away.

Koror Tribal Happenings (Day 22)

Everyone is just lounging around and counting grains of sand. The ones with half an eye open spot Stephenie walking up the beach. Koror is stunned by the turn of events. Stephenie is welcomed with open arms. Stephenie says her canoe is about a mile down the beach.

Ian: It is good to have someone new around with new thoughts and experiences.

The package to Koror contains a note congratulating Koror on their defeat of Ulong. The Ulong Tribe and their blue buff have been retired. There is a Koror buff inside for Stephenie. The note goes on to say that Koror will receive some visitors who will assist them.

Steph is quick to dump her Ulong buff. In doing so, she doesn't mean any disrespect to Ulong. It is just that she has entered a different stage in the game.

Stephenie is given the guided tour of the Koror campsite by Katie and Jennifer. They have a roof on their shelter and their toilet works. She loves it! Stephenie: It is amazing. I feel like I am in heaven. Jennifer to Stephenie: Everyone loves you!

Jenn tells us she is worried Stephenie will start making friends and eventually weasel her way into an alliance. Jenn: Stephenie needs to go...fast!

Walking with Katie and Jennifer, Stephenie informs them that Jeff and Kimberly "hooked up". Katie and Jenn are surprised at that bit of news.

Coby: Katie is kissing Stephenie's butt. Katie keeps blithering on about the special bond they had when they first started playing the 'Survivor' game. Coby thinks that is a load of crap. When he gets Stephenie alone he will give her the real low-down about the Koror Tribe. Coby: Koror is all sweet and loveable? Yeah, right.

Koror Tribal Happenings (Day 23)

Joe and Silent Bob, two natives of Palau, paddle into shore at the Koror camp. Koror greets them. Joe informs Koror that he is here to teach them how to fish. The first step is using insects to catch smaller fish to bait the larger fish. After Coby, Ian, Tom and Gregg practice scoring some bait, Joe says that it is phase two of Fishing Palau Style. Two will come out fishing with him while two will stay to catch more bait for them to use. Coby initially volunteers to remain behind then changes his mind. Dismissing Coby, Tom decides that himself, Ian and Gregg will go.

Coby to Ian and Tom: I am left out again. Whatever. Coby stomps off in a huff. Ian calls after Coby. Ian: Coby, wanna come fish? Coby's feet were made for walking.

Tom starts to show the women how to fish for bait. Coby interrupts. Coby: I will show them, Tom. I am the bait guy.

Tom, Gregg, Ian and Joe leave. Coby about Tom: I don't want to see his face anymore. Coby wishes the fishermen good luck and then calls Tom an "ass" under his breath.

Joe hauls in fish after fish then shows Ian, Gregg and Tom how to get the job done. Tom reels in a medium-sized catch. Tom: Nice.

The fishermen bring back about 14 or so fish. Joe wonders if Koror will join him in a drink before the fish fry starts. Evidently, Joe has a ton of rum to share. P-a-r-t-y! Everyone guzzles. Tom downs his rum straight up. At the dinner table, Tom mumbles and slurs. Katie: That's it. Tom, you are not driving tonight. Tom gets up from the table, stumbles and falls flat on his face. The others check to see if he is okay. Katie never expected he-man Tom to be the one who couldn't handle his booze. Stephenie helps put Tom to bed as he takes another header. Stephenie: She feels like the outcast and is nervous yet she feels a connection to Ian, Tom and Katie. She can't help but to wonder though if she is the next to go.

Doing the smart thing and staying downwind of Tom, Joe and Silent Bob decide to sleep in their canoe.

Koror Tribal Happenings (Day 24)

Tom is up early with Joe and Silent Bob. They begin catching some bait. He feels good. The party was fun though he doesn't remember some of it.

Koror says goodbye Joe and Silent Bob. Tom jokes that if they are ever in the neighbourhood, they should drop by again. Tom feels honoured to have had the fisherman share with them their skills, which must have been passed down from generation to generation.

As they watch Joe and Silent Bob sail off into the sunset, Ian turns to Tom and says: That was really cool. Tom: Yeah, they were great. Ian: I meant you getting drunk last night. Tom and Ian yuck it up.

Coby takes more shots at Tom. He is such a phoney with his fake laugh. Stephenie has really worked hard. She is a true Survivor. She deserves to finish on top.

Right in front of Katie, Jenn and Gregg, Coby calls Stephenie over to talk. Katie to the others: He is making it soooo obvious.

When he has Steph alone, Coby begins his sales pitch. He doesn't care if the others know what they are doing. He was bold about it on purpose. Coby reveals the divisions at Koror. Coby: The secret part is...Gregg and Jenn are with me and Janu. Coby insists that Stephenie or Janu are being targeted at Tribal Council. Coby to Stephenie: Jennifer is jealous of you because you kicked her ass in the challenges. Coby insists that the other women feel intimidated by Stephenie.

Stephenie goes back to Katie and Jennifer. They walk off together. Coby is not bothered at all. Coby: I got to her first.

Stephenie repeats to Katie and Jennifer what Coby told her including that they are jealous of her. Jenn and Katie laugh at the notion.

Katie: Stephenie is definitely a threat. Because of Coby, Stephenie knows about Jennifer's dislike of her. That is not good.

Stephenie meets with Tom. Tom is adamant that he, Stephenie, Katie and Ian are in a tight alliance. Tom: You have friends here who will keep you alive. Stephenie tells Tom she is grateful for that.

Stephenie: I don't know whom to believe. I have to figure some stuff out.

Immunity Challenge

Probst asks Koror for the Immunity Idol back. Stephenie complains that she never got to touch it. Probst allows her to before he switches it up with the Individual Immunity Necklace. Probst jokes that some of the players have never competed in challenges until now. He instructs Koror that they will go directly to Tribal Council when the challenge is over. It is an endurance challenge. The players must stand on perches in the water. If you fall off or sit down, you are gone.

Reward

  • Immunity from the Tribal Council vote.

    Result

  • Probst sits in a lawn chair. After one hour, Coby and Janu jump off when offered two donuts each. Coby flaunts the food in front of the others. Probst asks Katie if it means anything that Coby and Janu gave up Immunity to eat. Katie: Either they don't care or they think they aren't being voted off. At 2 hours and 23 minutes, Probst offers chocolate chips cookies. Gregg, Jennifer, Ian and Katie abandon the challenge. Probst makes it clear that Immunity is more important than some cookies. At 3 hours, Probst reveals pizza. Steph and Caryn quit. Steph and Caryn are told they cannot share the pizza with the others.

  • Winner: Tom.

    Koror Tribal Council Happenings

    Probst jokes that Stephenie has done the Tribal Council thing a lot. He comments that 8 out of the 9 players quit for food. He wonders if that will turn out to be a one million dollar mistake. Steph understands it is just a game and wouldn't be surprised if she was voted off. Probst asks Jennifer about being envious of Stephenie since she beat her at challenges whenever they were teamed up. Jenn says she likes Steph but she is competitive and good at everything it seems. Coby: Stephenie is popular and 'Survivor' is a game based on popularity. There are other targets though. Janu admits she hasn't pulled her own weight at camp. Janu: I have just laid around like a dead fish. Janu is sure she will be voted off tonight. Steph disagrees. It will be her. Steph says she quit because she wasn't sure she could beat Tom. She has a positive outlook but will be so mad if some slices of pizza ended her game. It will haunt her forever.

    Ian votes for Coby. It is like being in the Mafia. It is time for Coby to get whacked. Janu is shown voting for Stephenie.

    Final Voting:

    1. Ian: Coby.
    2. Katie: Coby.
    3. Tom: Coby.
    4. Janu: Stephenie.
    5. Gregg: Coby.
    6. Jennifer: Coby.
    7. Coby: Janu.
    8. Caryn: Coby.
    9. Stephenie: Coby.

    Tribal Council Victim:

    Coby Archa.

    Coby to everyone: Good game, guys. This is a great compliment. Thank you.

    Parting Comments

  • "God! What a group of wonderful, smart people who did give me a chance to be part of a team. You are very smart to get rid of me. Gosh, you're smart. What a total compliment. You didn't get rid of me because I was lazy. You didn't get rid of me because I wasn't good at challenges. Every single one of you said you got rid of me because you consider me a threat." -- Coby Archa. .

    On the next 'Survivor': Television.

    "Janu to Katie: What are we junior high, Katie? Janu reaches her breaking point. Janu to Katie: If I had something to say about you, I would say it to your face. A reward to remember. A native feast is shown. And the tribe cannot believe their ears. At a challenge which features some underwater cages, Probst tells the players: The first person to bail will be abandoned to live on their own."

    Powell's Thoughts:

    Stupid is as stupid does: What is wrong with these people? Did they all undergo lobotomies before appearing on the series? You never..and I repeat...NEVER...throw an Individual Immunity Challenge. 'Survivor' tribal politics are so unpredictable that you can be secure one day and then swimming upstream without a paddle the next based on an innocent comment or action. It can and does happen that quickly. Shame on them all for making one of the biggest blunders in 'Survivor' history.

    Steph: A real Survivor: Talk about your dramatic footage, eh? Wow. Despite knowing the producers would never allow the situation to get out of control, you have to hand it to Steph for toughing it out as she did. Unfortunately, it appears that Katie and Jenn are aligned against her. If she does take home an Immunity win, you can bet that will turn the tide against her in swift fashion.

    Stick a fork in Janu: Another outburst and another nail in the coffin. One suspects that Stephenie wins Immunity or is given another retrieve from Loser Island because the others are fed up with lugging around the dead weight that is Janu. Nobody likes a downer.

    Tom's downward spiral: Tonight, Tom continued to dig a deep hole for himself. He didn't endear himself to Coby over the whole fishing deal and he made Stephenie a promise that he most certainly will end up breaking. Tom had better take a step back and tone it down. He has made many enemies especially when it comes to the Koror women. One must remember how many seats the women might have on the jury.

    Katie the chatterbox: While Tom is busy alienating people, Katie is the social butterfly, it seems. As we saw this episode, she is interacting and befriending many people on Koror. That might just make the difference if she is lucky enough to secure herself a spot in the Final Two.

    To read Powell's 'Tale of the Torch', go here and follow all the latest 'Survivor' news in Jam! 'Survivor Palau'.