CANOE -- JAM! Television - TV Shows - Survivor2: Australian Outback: Episode Ten: Nick knocked

He was like Gervase without the charm. Survivor Two's resident layabout Nick Brown has been drawn and quartered. Though that wasn't the biggest revelation on the tenth episode of the reality show. Complaining for the longest time about feeling sick and not really lifting a finger, a toe or even an eye-lid to help out his tribe, it was no surprise that the law student -- who had all the personality of a soggy text book left out in the rain -- was dismissed.

The important turn of events occurred during the Tribal Council vote. The mistrusted Amber Brkich remained with the Ogakor Alliance even though they voted off her pal Jerri Manthey last week and didn't let her in on the scheme while Kucha members Elisabeth Filarski and Rodger Bingham cast their ballots against Amber. You can bet that unless there is an unforeseen shift in strategy on someone's part, the Ogakor Alliance is sure to go on to turf the entire Kucha Tribe. Elizabeth Filarski is possibly their next victim followed by that endearing country bumpkin, Rodger Bingham. Elizabeth appears to be weak and malnourished making her Ogakor's next logical choice and Bingham may be the group's most skillful fisherman but with the Survivors trading their shelter for rice, he isn't as valuable to the team as he once was.

The remaining Survivors at the start of the broadcast were:

Barramundi Tribe

Barramundi Tribe Happenings (Day 28)

Amber sits alone by the fire. She's the only person in the Barramundi Tribe who misses Jerri Manthey's shrill voice which I am convinced drove all of the wildlife away. What else could possibly explain why these do-nothing Survivors can't get off their sorry butts and hunt for food? Amber feels sad, isolated and betrayed. "Iron Chef" Keith tells us Amber deserves it for being Jerri's Mini Me. Later, he joyfully sings...Ding dong! The Witch is dead!

The Survivors take turns whimpering about starving to death though there are fish swimming deep in the river (as the cameras have shown us) and animals in the Outback just waiting to be barbecued. Nick and Keith lift up their shirts to show us how much their bellies have shrunk. Thankfully, they stop there.

About to be canceled by the Ogakor network, another Fishing With Rodger episode airs. As Tina, Liz and Rodger lose more fishing hooks in the murky Herbert River, Keith and Colby hunt not wild boars, birds or even toads but set their sights on a more elusive prey: the bloodthirsty and always unpredictable Australian grasshopper. Steve (Crocodile Hunter) Irwin...eat your friggin' heart out, mate. With nothing but his trusty fishing net to protect him, the sure-footed Keith carefully stalks the savage insects. An unarmed Colby doesn't have much luck though he manages to escape from the festering nesting ground without suffering any serious injuries. Whew! Keith says Colby is failing because he can't "sneak up on them" like he can. Colby hopes that Master Keith can teach "this young grasshopper how to catch grasshoppers". All in all, it is time well spent even though the shelter is leaking every time it rains and the Survivors are down to their last thimbleful of rice. Go team!

Reward Challenge

Each Survivor is provided with $500 Australian dollars. They gather at the first ever (hopefully the LAST ever) Survivor Food Auction. Left alone, these inept Survivors would starve to death unless the producers chipped in so once again the rules of the game are dispensed with for the time being. So much for "surviving", eh?

Reward

It one big cruel joke. The Survivors can use the money they are given to bid on "meals". The "meals" themselves turn out to be mostly unhealthy junk food (chips and pop) provided by the sponsors.

Result

Nick buys 4 chips and salsa dip for $60. Elizabeth pays $260 for a few squares of chocolate and some peanut butter. Nick forks out $100 for a beer and some scraps. Colby pays $280 for an energy bar and some iced coffee. Elizabeth and Tina pool their money to purchase some bread, mashed potatoes and turkey for $340. Amber spends $200 on the "mystery meal". It's just a cup of Herbert River water. Keith chomps on some pizza. A patient Rodger spends $320 on a hamburger.

Winners: The Survivors, the producers, the junk food sponsors and the local emergency room.

Just when you think this show couldn't sink any lower....Returning to camp everyone except Colby and Amber are sick as dogs because their bodies are reacting to the sudden food intake. They take turns scampering to the latrine. Ever the eloquent one, Nick says he is going to have a bath so the tent that night doesn't smell like "ass". "Whoa! That felt good!," says a sheepish Rodger on his way back. Rodger jokes that the leaf he used for toilet paper had a hole in it. If there was ever a time to release the man-eating, animatronic crocodiles it is now, Mr. Burnett.

Barramundi Tribe Happenings (Day 29)

More griping about there being no food. Still there is no hunting done. Due to the heavy rainfall the Herbert River is beginning to encroach upon the Survivors' camp. Nick does what he does best...sit around and grumble. He is so sick that he exclaims..."God, get me out of here soon!". Rodger, Liz and Tina cast their lines at the fishing hole. Liz is disappointed in Nick for not coming. She thinks he might have a grand plan working. Relax, rest and save his energy for the Immunity Challenges. No, Liz. He's just a lazy lima bean.

Immunity Challenge (Day 29)

There are seven large scale-like structures set-up. On one end is a compartment to make a fire in. On the other is a large basin to put water. The catch is the water basin has a hole in it. The Survivors must first start a fire on one end and then fill up the basin with water on the other so the scale tips upwards and the fire lights a fuse.

Reward

Immunity from Tribal Council.

Result

Keith comes close. His scale rises then as the water pours out, it sinks again. Colby is the last to finish building a fire but is able to come from behind and win. Earlier in the contest, Keith is admonished by Jeff for pressing down on the scale to test it.

Winner: Colby.

Barramundi Tribe Happenings (Day 30)

Tina says everyone's body is still in shock from eating at the auction. They are almost out of food and don't know what to do about it. Well, duh. Liz is ill. She begins to cry openly. Sitting beside her, Nick gives her a hug. Finally, Nick accompanies the Fishing Threesome to the hole. Liz is so drained that they turn back so she can rest.

Jeff arrives with enough rice to last the Survivors the rest of the game. He says this is an "awkward situation" because the Survivors were given way more than enough food if they rationed it properly. Of course, the real awkward situation is that the producers were forced to interfere in the gameplay once again. A perturbed Jeff puts the Survivors on the spot. He demands to know what happened to their food. Rodger says diplomatically that they just weren't careful and that it is no one person's fault. Tina yammers and stammers about condensation on the rice, dogs in the Outback eating their rations, a hungry and forgotten Aboriginal tribe stealing away their food during the night or something. Jeff informs the tribe that they can have the rice but they must give him something in return. Rodger offers the tribe's blankets. Jeff scoffs at that. It's the tribe's shelter for the food. The Survivors accept the deal. They tear down the tarps and Colby's Texas flag. Colby hands it to Jeff saying "Take care of that would you?". The Survivors work to build a new shelter further up away from the rising river. Nick supervises.

Colby and Keith chat about Amber. They are fearful she might align herself with the Kuchas. Liz comments that it wasn't smart for the Ogakor Alliance to vote Jerri off. It has made them vulnerable. Amber believes she could join the Kuchas and kick Ogakor off. She doesn't know if she can trust the Kangas though. "I have to play the game," she says. Keith purposely doesn't bring his backpack to Tribal Council.

Tribal Council

Alicia and Jerri sit on the Survivor Jury. Jeff asks Tina about the shelter for food trade. Tina thinks it was fair as they can rebuild the shelter. Nick is surprised at the toll Survivor has taken on his body. Amber says Survivor has taught her to try new things and the experience has changed her as a person. Jeff reminds everyone that as the jury gets larger, the power base might shift.

Nick votes for Keith as he sees his decision to not bring his backpack to Tribal Council to be very arrogant. Tina selects Nick. Here's your ticket to leave, she snipes.

Final Voting

Parting Comments

"It's been a great adventure...had some great times and some big lows. The last few days were really rough on me and it's taught me a lot about not only my strengths but more importantly, my weaknesses. I kinda feel invincible at times and Survivor has been a big reality check for me. It's been a ride. It has definitely been a ride."- Nick Brown.

Powell's Comments

On next week's show the Herbert River swells even more. Last night's episode was the worst episode of Survivor I have ever laid eyes on. Basically, the auction and the rice deal were total condemnations of the Survivors' ability to provide for themselves. It is shameful that they were irresponsible with their rations and had to be bailed out particularly if you understand that they were given "emergency rations" too. Barramundi doesn't hold a candle to Tagi or Pagong. Neither does this sequel to the original Survivor. Next time, the producers would be best advised to cast more motivated, lively and determined people. As a team, Barramundi just doesn't cut it.